Bi-Annual Report on February Resolutions

I was reminded today that many institutions are coming to the close of the fiscal year, and it seemed like a good time to make an accounting of progress on my 2009 resolutions. Here's the round-up:

Composting--I have the composter, and it has stuff in it. But it's not quite compost. I haven't turned the pile for a couple months. It got a bit out of whack with too many "greens" (mostly kitchen waste, in this case) and not enough "browns" (shredded paper, cardboard, dried grass, etc.). I do need to get back in the groove with it.

Beside the composter, though, we do have 18 square feet of garden with some lovely plants growing. We've already been harvesting herbs and lettuce, and we're eagerly awaiting the carrots, bell peppers, squash, and eggplant. Our trusty neighbor is going to keep it all alive while we're on vacation.

Exercise--I've gotten into a good exercise routine. Three days a week of Fluidity during the kids' naptime, and two to three days a week of walking with the kids. I've even managed to get right back to exercising after trips, and we've been incorporating hiking and walking into family days and dates. The kids and I have also been taking a once-a-week parent-kid dance class, which gives us all a chance to get in some much needed wiggling.

Eating Healthfully--I'm eating healthfully enough to be 15 lbs. lighter than I was in February. (I'm down to the weight I was at the end of my freshman year of college--for the first time since then.) Eating well on upcoming summer vacations will be a challenge, but I feel like I have the tools to choose better eating.

Dissertation work--I did turn in a prospectus draft this month and got a good response from my advisor. I'm finalizing the draft this summer, and I'm starting on a conference paper/chapter. (Side note: I got a paper accepted to a panel, and the panel was accepted to the Renaissance Society of America conference in Venice, Italy, in April 2010. Now I need to add "learn Italian" to my list.) I also managed to find a preschool and get the kids enrolled for fall. With some husband help delivering the kids to preschool, I'll have an additional 8+ hours a week of daytime work starting September 1.

Laughing--We could still laugh more. Must work on this one. :)

Limiting commitments--I'm still not great at limiting commitments. I am starting to feel guilty about saying Yes to things. I haven't added much to my schedule, and I've been more aware of how busy a week our family can handle. And I think it's finally sunk in that I should never, ever schedule anything for Monday mornings.

Other stuff--I haven't pulled out the knitting needles, but I've had the opportunity to do some musical things--writing some songs with my husband, playing with friends, leading the band at church, recording some songs. For my birthday, my husband gave me "recording a kids' album," so we're gathering equipment and getting ready to take some evenings off and lay down some tracks. Our son is also learning to read, and we're taking our time with it. All in all, the 2009 resolutions seem reasonable, helpful, and accomplishable. We still don't have our pictures hung in our new place, and I've still got three boxes left to unpack, but all in good time.

The Pull of Summer

I’m feeling springy! Summer’s just around the corner. I can see my discipline standing up to walk out the door. Other people are grading their last finals. Other people are eagerly awaiting their kids’ last day of school. I am trying to make myself believe that it’s important to read more Shakespeare in what I’m dangerously beginning to think of as my “free time” or “spare time.” I’m even tempted to lift my weeknight TV/movie ban to watch the new season of “So You Think You Can Dance,” but I’m not sure if our converter box will pick up Fox, and I think maybe I’m better off not knowing.

On good days, studying is a lifeline to a world outside of hurrying my son to the potty, changing diapers, preparing five meals/snacks a day, folding laundry, doing dishes, and wondering why the vacuum is still sitting out and the paper scraps and styrofoam crumbs are still on the living room floor. I’ll admit, that outside world is populated with long dead people and people who never existed in the first place, but it’s a world of larger ideas that I’ve traveled in before. It reminds me that this daily world I’m living with isn’t without the big ideas, it’s just harder for me to see them through the cobwebs on the windows.

On bad days, studying keeps me from feeling a connection to the larger culture--I don’t know what happened on Lost, I haven’t watched American Idol in years, I’ve missed the last few hundred great new books, and I get my news from listening to “Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me” while I do dishes. My cocktail conversation, if I ever went to cocktail parties, would be limited to balance bikes and images of motherhood in 430 year old books.

But then my daughter walks up, says “I want some mama milk,” and I melt. I pick up my Shakespeare book and settle in to nurse.

5 Things

Facebook is going a little crazy with the "5 things" posts. And the things I really want to post about aren't in the celebrity listing, so I thought I'd post some here.

5 Favorite Kids Musicians/Albums

-The Nields, we're especially fond of their HooteNanny music class curriculum

-Elizabeth Mitchell, "You are My Little Bird," and "Catch the Moon" with Lisa Loeb

-Orange Sherbet and Hot Buttered Rum, "Campfire Songs"

-Ginger Hendrix, "Macaroni Boy Eats at Chez Shooby Do"

-my husband

5 best smart English words

-liminal

-valences

-mores

-NB (for nota bene)

-bifurcated (as in "bifurcated plot")

5 words I find in my literary reading that are out of current usage (more or less)

-bokin' (as in "bokin' rainbows," what one might do after a heavy night of imbibing; it's actually a auld Scots term)

-inveigle (a 17th century favorite)

-troth (has elements of "truth" and "trust")

-rankle (from the a word meaning "to fester")

-soote (see Surrey's sonnet "The Soote Season")

5 musical things I wish I had done (and might still do, given the opportunity)

-joined the band JimmyFish in college when asked

-learned to play an instrument well enough to perform with it

-finished my BA in music, but in choral conduction instead of vocal performance

-paid more attention in ear training and music theory classes (and actually retained more information than just how to identify the "Foxy Lady" chord when I hear it)

-made an album

5 flowers I love to see growing

-tulips

-California poppies

-night-smelling jasmine

-hydrangeas

-camellias

5 most wise mentors

-Mary Ann, who taught me that nothing can be done perfectly, but that it's important to still strive toward it.

-Isabel, who gave up her kid-free Saturday mornings to hang out with a goofy high schooler, and told me that you shouldn't expect your spouse to change, but you shouldn't expect him not to change either.

-Mary, who included me in her busy household, and taught me that intense study and community are amazing things indeed.

-Bill and Joyce, who counseled us that in marriage, many, many things can be repaired on long walks.

-my parents, who pray for me and who have always known when to let me figure things out for myself.

5 things I appreciate about my mom now that I'm a mom (NB: This list is not exhaustive)

-giving up years of good sleep to care for me and my brothers

-teaching us to make all the good things she cooked: whole wheat bread, granola, fruit leather, balanced meals

-needing to take time off on our vacations to just lay by the river and read

-teaching through example how important it is to help others in whatever ways we can

-never making me feel shame

San Luis Obispo Visitor's Guide: Installment #1

Some friends of ours recently took a trip to San Luis Obispo, where my husband grew up and where I lived for 8 years. We didn't prep them very well, evidently: they didn't know that San Luis is not actually a beach town, took a long and mistaken walk up the Monterey St. hill, ate dinner at Apple Farm AND ordered the meatloaf. So I've promised to let her know our top stops in SLO.* 

Restaurants of choice:

Firestone: you can't lose with the ABC burger, the tri-tip sandwich, or the small steak cobb salad with vinaigrette dressing. Mmmm, and the fries.

Big Sky: My fave for breakfast. Everything's great, but particularly the journeycakes with swiss cheese and the beignets. For lunch, I love the japanese eggplant sandwich. Do check out their specials board for all meals.

Buona Tavola: We used to go for a light lunch of soup and salad. I love the lattughette, but my husband prefers the caesar.  Their tapenade and bread are fantastic. If they have the rack of lamb special, get it. The gnocchi is also amazing, and we've become fond of the pasta dish with tons of different meats on it (fettucini al sugo di carni miste: slow braised chicken, duck, veal, and beef in an herbed meat sauce). My favorite dessert is the crema with caramel topping.

Farmer's Market: If you're in SLO on a Thursday evening, don't miss the Farmer's Market. Grab a meal at one of the many food stands, people watch, and listen to the great musicians that play on the side streets.

Linnaea's: Great coffee, great atmosphere. It's particularly good if you have a few minutes by yourself to relax. Their lunch options are super yummy. Try an iced coffee (complete with coffee ice cubes) or a white hot chocolate.

Gus's Grocery: THE place for sandwiches. Fantastic mojo potatoes, and great outdoor seating. It gets a little chaotic inside, so we usually send one or two folks in to place the order. Order a half sandwich. They're almost as big as the regular size, and quite a bit cheaper.

Muzio's: My favorite sandwich in the world: fresh mozzarella, tomatoes, basil on a fresh baguette, drizzled with balsamic vinegar. I haven't had one in ages because we always manage to try to go on Sundays when they're closed. There's not a lot of indoor seating, so order and take the sandwiches down to the mission (a block away) to eat overlooking the creek.

Mo's BBQ: We had our rehearsal dinner at Mo's (in its previous location). Their pulled pork sandwich topped with slaw is fantastic, and they've got some good beer on tap. The cornbread is tasty, too.

Windows on the Water (in Morro Bay): The food is pretty good, but I'd recommend going late in the evening and just getting dessert. Their homemade ice cream and sorbet are delicious (you get three small scoops, each a different flavor), and I once had an amazing blood orange semi-freddo (it tasted almost like a Push-Up pop).

For the beach town feel: hang out in Pismo. Definitely stop in at Splash Cafe for clam chowder and grilled cheese sandwiches. (The food is even better if you're sandy and salty.)

*We moved away from the area in 2003. Though we visit at least a couple times a year, I feel a bit behind on what has changed since we moved, and I'd love updates on what should be added to the list or taken off.

February Resolutions

It seems that February is becoming the 'new year' marker in our family. My husband started his current job a year ago today, we'll send out our Christmas letter this month, and I'm starting my new year's resolutions. I've had a month to really consider what 2009 can handle. So here goes:

- Composting: we've got a backyard composter started, and I even took a class from the City of Sunnyvale to find out exactly how to do it. The kids love to help put stuff in it and turn the pile. And we sure do end up with a lot of compostable kitchen scraps.

-Exercise: I had a good year last year with exercise, thanks to my sister-in-law's infomercial find. I'm hoping to get back in the habit of regular exercise, including walking with the kids.

-Eating healthfully: I have a huge sweet tooth and have always had a haphazard relationship with food and dieting. My uncle recommended The Beck Diet Solution, and I'm ready for 2009 to be the year I change my eating habits for good.

-Dissertation work: I took almost two months off for holidays and moving, but I'm getting back in the groove. I'm aiming to have a prospectus done in June, and I'm working now on ways to expand my work hours in the coming year (read: finding a preschool).

-Laughing: I told my husband last night that I don't think we laugh enough in our house. Whenever we go to my parents' house, we end up laughing for an hour the first night about all the crazy stuff our kids have done. It gives us some much needed perspective. So I'm hoping this year we can laugh more with our kids and about our kids.

-Limiting commitments: I've been realizing in the last few days that I absolutely cannot over-commit if I want to accomplish the things that are really, really important to me (as opposed to just 'really important'). I think it will take me a few weeks to figure out what commitments should go on each list. At the top of the 'really, really' list: Sleep.

Since I'm so prone to over-commitment, I'm going to stop there. Of course, there are oodles of other things I want to do: play the banjo, play the guitar, write songs, learn to speak French, keep the house uber-tidy, teach my son to read, take the car to the shop when it needs to go, knit a lot, organize photographs, hang the pictures in our new place.  But they'll get done when they get done. Maybe that's my last resolution: to really believe that.

Moving Quickly

I've been amazed in the past week at how quickly a move can be arranged. We got our 30 days notice on our rental December 1. We signed a lease December 6. On December 8, I booked packers/movers, hired cleaners (for the old place), changed utilities and mail service, and scheduled my parents to come help. We'll get our stuff packed on the 15th, camp out in our new place that night, and then move in on the 16th. We should be completely out of our old place by the 20th. (Now if the landlord will let us end our lease on the 21st, we'd be stoked.)

For this move, the logistics seem to be the easy part. Much harder is explaining to a 3 year old and a one year old what will be happening. The big selling point for my son is that this new house has grass in the back AND the front (we currently have a 3'x3' concrete 'porch' in the front), but he's still uncertain about leaving our neighborhood friends. His only other experience with moving was last December when we moved across the country; we haven't seen his Massachusetts friends since.

We're all a bit frazzled with the speed at which we're moving, and we're still recovering from Thanksgiving and it's accompanying illnesses. We're also a bit fearful of all the changes, even though many of them--like the walkability of the neighborhood--will be positive changes. But we're grateful for our new house and how quickly it has become ours. We hope it becomes our home just as quickly.

Lame Mom Move

On Sunday, after church, my three-year-old son was playing with a little spinner toy and taking turns quite nicely with a little girl (the spinner belonged to a third child). Our church meets at a high school, and the kids were running around outside the auditorium. Everything was going swimmingly, until my son got that mischievous grin and tossed the spinner right into the trash can. I managed to take the filthy can top off with one hand--the other was holding my daughter--and was pleased to find that the spinner had landed in a recently replaced and very clean trash bag, right on top of a clean bulletin. It looked germ free to me! So I took it out and handed it to my son's playmate.

A moment later, I saw the girl's dad returning the toy to its owner with instructions to clean it and taking his daughter to wash her hands.

Now I'm the mom who hands dirty trash toys to kids.

And the moral of the story? I'm debating between "not all trash cans are dirty inside," "you can't judge a trash can by its dirty lid, nor the quality of a mom by her cleanliness," and "all moms need grace."